2 Years Ago...

two years...

two hundred-fifty posts....

78 followers...

34 unpublished drafts...

21,266 page views

ago and I started my blog.

honestly, i'm pretty amazed. i'm sure i've said this plenty of times, but when i started in 2011, i never really expected to get any followers. i thought i was just going to do my little thing and then, maybe in a year or so, be done with it.

needless to say, i'm not done with it.

and i hope to ''not be done with it'' for quite a while yet.

happy blog anniversary, self!

Be Yourself {Everybody Else Is Already Taken}

I don't want to be somebody who's already taken. I want to be my own, have my own style of blogging. I don't want to change to gain followers{as much as I'd like to have a lot of you}.
It's sorta hard to find a way to say it, but basically I don't want to look back on blogging years when I'm older and think ''those were the years that I changed for others''.


*************

she smiled, the wind harsh against her cheeks, the life bursting out of her. she could only think of all the times she said no. no. no. no. no. no. no. no to being somebody else. she let her arms go; let the wind push them. oh, the wind, she thought, it thinks it pushes me but it has no idea of my control. no idea of my control. she liked the ring to it. 
she thought of the years when she was tempted to say yes. yes to change herself. and, how better off she was now then she ever would have been.

***************

I guess all I'm trying to say is be yourself. don't waste your time being somebody else.

Under My Christmas Tree {More Fan-fiction}

My mouth gaps open.

I'll admit it--I snuck down to the family room before anybody else was awake, just to see the presents. And there Tom Hiddleston was, under my tree.

''You're awake!'' Tom says, smiling. He re-adjusts the sparkly red Christmas bow on his head. ''How rude am I?! Sitting while you're standing, I'm so sorry,'' he says, jumping up.

I numbly sit down by the tree, closing my eyes. No. This is too good to be true.

 ''Those pajamas are absolutely lovely.''

I open my eyes. Tom's still there, with his sparkling eyes and messy hair.

''Th-Thanks,'' I can finally speak. ''Yours are great, too,'' I half-whisper. He looks down, pleased, at his Avengers onesie. ''I got it from Santa when he delivered me!'' he says. He also shows me an opened package of ginger cookies. {''I was hungry,'' he explains.}

''Now, I got this for you,'' Tom says, handing me a mini plush Loki doll. I giggle, half from happiness and the rest from hysteria. Tom Hiddleston under my tree. I knew I'd been good.

''I'm sorry, I didn't know you were coming,'' I whisper. I blush furiously.
Tom takes my hand. If I could have blushed more, I would have.
''You're the only thing I wanted for Christmas.''

The Dauntless Story

I suck in a breath. What exhilaration, what power. My muscles coil and then bounce back, letting the knife go with them. The knife goes where I want it to go. The bull's eye. It'd go nowhere else.
My instructor gives me a slight nod. I am the first to hit the bull's eye. I throw another knife. Not quite the bull's eye, but it makes a satisfying thunk against the cardboard.

***

My breath is loud; heavy. It'll give me away. 

I watch the girl, dressed in her yellow raincoat. She can't be more than seven. Before it happens, I see the man running at her with a gun, firing. I also know what I'll do before it happens.

I'll do what any other Dauntless would do, save her. For that is courage, and courage is what we are built upon.

I run out from my alley before the man can even be seen. I push myself into the air, in front of the girl. The bullet pierces right above my heart. Enough to hurt, but not to kill me. The pain's excruciating. I clutch at my chest, leaving my hands stained crimson. Oh, oh, is all I can think. The girl runs away. Good, I think this time, she won't be hurt. The thought nearly takes all of the pain away, reminds me why I am here. I am here because I am Dauntless.

The pain wasn't real, but I can still feel it. The stickiness of the blood on my hand, the pain above my heart. I'm told it doesn't go away. 

One of the other initiates catches up to me, scowling. ''They told me to choose, and I did. I chose to stay in my alley. And now they beat me for it!'' He complains. It's Max. He is Dauntless-born and I am Erudite...was Erudite; but somehow we became friends. 

''You didn't save her?'' I ask in surprise. I think of her sweet, haunting face and wonder how he couldn't. ''And risk my life? Of course not,'' he answers. 

He turns to walk backwards, facing me. He grins. I once thought his grin was beautiful, a grin of a boy I'd like to know. But now it's only sadistic. 

''When I'm a Dauntless leader, I'm going to take this out of the initiation process. It's useless.'' His voice is certain, and I believe him. 

I quickly flit pass him, not wanting to think about him, or the future. ''Tori,'' he yells, ''Tori, wait up!''

Room Tour

Here is what my room looks like! Nothing really matches but it's home-y. :)

 my Christmas tree. :)

 {@Kara ;)}

 my bookshelf. I have more books, but they're stashed somewhere else. :3

 a ''single socks'' meeting is happening on my dresser. ;) They're decided if they should go skiing or have a Christmas cookie exchange for this month. Help them decide by voting on the sidebar. ;)

 pointe shoes can actually stand up by themselves.

That's it! I hoped you enjoyed it. Remember to vote on the sidebar for the Single Socks! Also, is your Christmas tree up yet? If it is, what's your favorite ornament on it? :)

post script: my parakeet decided to type with me as I was writing this up. ;)

 

 

As of Late

thinking: about sugar, Christmas, and my ballet class later today. Pointe!

being: lazy.

eating: {last thing I ate} cake. XD

inspired by: lavender hair. still. I won't stop until I get it, I tell you! ;)

writing: a NaNoWriMo novel.

one blog i'm loving lately: Kenzie's

homework: map out Europe, write some lab reports, and read some science. not that bad.

reading: City of Lost Souls by Cassandra Clare. I need the sixth one to come out already!!
to-read list: Beautiful Redemption, The Book Thief...

'K y'all. That's about as much as my lazy fingers can handle. Now off to watch some 30 Rock... {no shame}

Books I Want To Read

Okay, so this is only a few of the books I want to read. I don't want to make a mile-long post. ;)

{All pictures from Amazon. }

 

Ruby Red, by Kerstin Gier

 

 

So, I think this trilogy has been out for a while but I'm just getting on it. It seems really interesting and I like the cover {that's what I base most of my choices on. ;)} Excerpt:

 

Gwyneth Shepherd's sophisticated, beautiful cousin Charlotte has been prepared her entire life for traveling through time. But unexpectedly, it is Gwyneth who in the middle of class takes a sudden spin to a different era!
Gwyneth must now unearth the mystery of why her mother would lie about her birth date to ward off suspicion about her ability, brush up on her history, and work with Gideon—the time traveler from a similarly gifted family that passes the gene through its male line, and whose presence becomes, in time, less insufferable and more essential. Together, Gwyneth and Gideon journey through time to discover who, in the 18th century and in contemporary London, they can trust.

{Ahh, insurable blogger. You won't let me post my pictures}

 

Darkest Minds, by Alexandra Bracken

 

 

When Ruby woke up on her tenth birthday, something about her had changed. Something alarming enough to make her parents lock her in the garage and call the police. Something that gets her sent to Thurmond, a brutal government "rehabilitation camp." She might have survived the mysterious disease that's killed most of America's children, but she and the others have emerged with something far worse: frightening abilities they cannot control.

Now sixteen, Ruby is one of the dangerous ones.

When the truth comes out, Ruby barely escapes Thurmond with her life. Now she's on the run, desperate to find the one safe haven left for kids like her-East River. She joins a group of kids who escaped their own camp. Liam, their brave leader, is falling hard for Ruby. But no matter how much she aches for him, Ruby can't risk getting close. Not after what happened to her parents.

When they arrive at East River, nothing is as it seems, least of all its mysterious leader. But there are other forces at work, people who will stop at nothing to use Ruby in their fight against the government. Ruby will be faced with a terrible choice, one that may mean giving up her only chance at a life worth living.

 

 

 



 

Delirium, bye Lauren Oliver

 

 

Ninety-five days, and then I’ll be safe.

I wonder whether the procedure will hurt.

I want to get it over with.

It’s hard to be patient.

It’s hard not to be afraid while I’m still uncured, though so far the deliria hasn’t touched me yet.

Still, I worry.

They say that in the old days, love drove people to madness.

The deadliest of all deadly things: It kills you both when you have it and when you don’t.

So many words, guys. -.-

 

Have you read/want to read any of these? What books are on your to-read list?

 

 



This Week

• Bill O'Reilly. He's killing Lincoln, he's killing Jesus, he's killing Kennedy. Somebody needs to put a stop to this man. ;)
• Purple hair. Just GAHHH, short hair.
• Pointe shoes.  They hurt. So, I've been en pointe for about a month now. :)
• Convos with a non-blogging friend. 
• NANOWRIMO! On track and seriously guys, there's inspiration for writing everywhere.
• Word sprints. See how many words you can write in 20 minutes, no pausing. I got 940.
• A little bird who's unbelievably fussy. She fell off her perch by accident and wouldn't stop squawking about it. 
• People who are rude to you but expect you to treat them nicely.  

That's about it y'all. Remember, you can still ask me stuff -le crazy face- on the post below. And comment on what y'all have been reading lately! We wants to know. XD

Ask Me Anything // STORY OF MY LIFE!!

I've never done one of these, but if you want....

ask me anything! Here are some suggestions via Pinterest:



So, you get the gist of that. NEXXTTTTTT....

Story of my life!!


Watch it. NOW! Before 1D was singing sorta boy-ish songs, but this one is so mature and just GAHHH. I mean, I love both sides of their music, but this is what really speaks to me.

Anyway, watch it on repeat so we can break the record. XD

i crave purple hair.

 not like, you know, the bright out-80's purple. no way, not a fan. but the really soft, light, lilacs? love 'em.
but right now, my hair is too short for any dip-dying of the sort, so, not right now. but sometime in the future, i'd love it.

 

 

 

 

and a pink, just for fun:

 

 

 

 

 

see what i mean? i'm not adventurous enough to go full color, but some dip-dying? sure.

So.... Allegiant... {no spoilers}

I finished it last night.

And man.... just.... ROAR AKLDFJLAKDJFLKANDKLFJADKLFNALKDJFLAKDJFLKDJALKFJ!

I mean, I love V.R., but I'm so mad at her right now. Seriously guys, just.... ROARRR!


{Happy late Halloween everybody! Did you do anything for Halloween?}

So.... I went Rock-Climbing.

Yeah, rock climbing. First time ever.

My hands are red, and boy, they hurt. But I had a fun time.

I reached the top only once {1 session = 3 climbs}, and had an almost annoyingly perky instructor, but yeah, it was fun. :)

Would I go again? Yes. And I'd reach that top all three times. -.-



{this is basically just a hello post. so... hello. :)}

Fandoms and Other Things to Gasp and Squeal Over

You read it, y'all.

The ultimate edition of a fandom post. Fasten your seatbelts, folks, you're in for a long ride.


FIRST OFF......


THE DIVERGENT SERIES!!!!!
*first off, i'd just like to state that I was a divergent fan before Divergent was even going to be a movie, before Insurgent was out. thank you.*


GUYS, THAT PLOT TWIST WE WERE LEFT ON IN INSURGENT. OH MY GOODNESS. I MUST FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENS!
I'm not going to buy/preorder Allegiant because I don't have Insurgent, and it doesn't really make sense to me to not have a complete collection. I mean, like if I had Divergent AND Insurgent things would change, but I think it would be sorta weird with Divergent and Allegiant. Sorry for dah rant. XD


THE MORTAL INSTRUMENTS SERIES:


*magnus bane ^^^}


From the moment I read the first book in The Mortal Instrument series, I was hooked. HONESTLY GUYS. It's so good and Cassandra Clare's writing is fabulous. Even if I didn't like the story/plot, I would read it for CC's writing alone.
Plot twists were hitting me everywhere. AND ALEC AND MAGNUS BANE.... I NEVER SAW THAT COMING. NOR CLARY AND JACE BEING.... sorry guys. almost spoiled it.

And second, let me state off my deep and nerdy love for Simon. Yeah, Simon. The nerd in me calls out for him, and who cares, I think he's cool. -.-


THE FAULT IN OUR STARS:

Guys, I wish I bought more books. But because I'm poor when I'm not broke {which is most of the time} I don't. but The Fault in Our Stars... I actually bought it. all $17.99 hardback glory of it.





And Shailene Woodley casted as Hazel? Best thing ever. I actually like the idea of her role in TFioS than Divergent better.
And the book is so... raw and honest and bucket-of-tears-by-your-bedside-table.


THE SELECTION, THE ELITE, AND THE ONE:


This is The One, which is not out yet -cries-. But honestly, LOOK AT THE COVER. -FANGIRL ATTACK- It's SOOOO beautiful. I NEED TO READ IT. GIMME. GIMME.
I also bought The Selection and The Elite. and I plan to buy The One, because guys, this series rock.
And Maxon all the way. I mean, I love Aspen too. I understand what he's done and how it's so hard to do what he's doing. Some people look at his character and think that he's cruel, but he gives up happiness so that he won't hurt the people he love for long-time, instead of the little hurt.
So, I love you Aspen, but Maxon. Honestly. Maxon. UGHHHH! -cries, rolls down on the floor, beats fists on floor- Y DO U HAVE TO B SO PERFECT MAXON?!?! *I know how to spell. ;) I was just using that for bleeping effect.*


THE HUNGER GAMES SERIES:




*for Mackie. Yes, this is one of your future husbands. -wiggles eyebrows- yes, i know about Ansel Elgort. ;) *

*and guys, i'm in the fighting group for Ansel Elgort along with Mackie and Emma.*

OKAY, NOW THAT I'M DONE WITH THAT.... *sobs that i used the word ''okay''* The Hunger Games!
I loved the first book. Catching Fire was even better. But Mockingjay? Honestly, that one isn't really a favorite. Due to pinterest, it seems others feel the same, as well. -.-
CATCHING FIRE IS COMING OUT IN NOVEMBER AND GAHH, GUYS, I WANNA SEE IT! I can't wait for it.
I think what draws people to books like TFioS and HG is that they're so raw. They are completely made up stories, but the authors still don't sugar-coat anything. Yet they're books you keep coming back for.


That's it guys. Almost all of my fangirl has been squeezed outta me like an orange. *ew, sorry*. O_O

What Dah The Fox Say

 

 



 

Sincerely, Madeline

Sharpies

I have a strange obsession for sharpies. O_O Sharpies for Christmas? Yes please.

Here are some sharpies I've been craving:

See that pale pale yellow? And all those pastels? *sigh*

 

 

 

*blogger is malfunctioning. I apologize.* Gold, silver, and copper. I think the copper's the prettiest.

 

 

 

And that's it y'all. If you ever want to buy me sharpies, don't hesitate to ask. ;)

*short little post*

Guys, Ed Sheeran is going to be helping some on The Voice {'Murica}. So excited!!

My Babies {Pointe Shoes}

October first, I was told that I could go out and buy my pointe shoes. Which is fabulous, y'all.
These are my babies. They're Capezio Glisses {wide because I have large feet. -.-}

 
{I know the strings are untucked. They will not be like that for class}

 

 

And guys, they hurt... A LOT. I'm not even doing anything major yet but it still hurts like crazy. -cries in a corner-

Today's my second pointe class and modern, so right now I'm just looking for a way to get to ballet/modern quickly. I WANTS TO DANCE.

 

Okay y'all. -happy dance- I havveee some posts comin' up.

 

P.S. I bought The Fault in Our Stars, The Elite, The Selection, and Cinders. I've read all of them except Cinders before, but I needed to add them to my precious books. Now I just need to buy Matched because I have the second and third book in the series for some reason, but not the first. -.- XD

This Week {#4}

this week:
ordering *ahem* some things. Online shopping and Amazon, I love you.
a haiku to Amazon:
amazon, thank you,
for beautiful things I don't need,
but buy anyway.
{incase you didn't notice, the last line's fifth syllable is in the second line because I can't write poetry.}
MODERN! yeahhhhh. Okay, for those of you who don't know, modern {a form of dance} is like ballet and jazz mixed together. This is the first year I could take it at my dance studio and *fangirl moment* I love it.
The total of boots I own rising up to two! *another fangirl moment* I love boots. love love love.
When your pet bird will sit on your shoulder and watch you finish math. And she preens your hair, nibbles on your ear, and makes soft sounds to you.

I have things I need to post about but I don't want to take pictures. Ehhhh.

A Pair of Red Heels



Ugly, green... defeated. That's what described the woman who looked like she came straight out of The Wizard Of Oz, standing right infront of me.
I clicked my red heels together once and she glared at me. ''It's rude to gloat,'' she snarled. My tiny terrier barked fiercely at her. She aimed a horribly aimed kick at him, missing by a foot or two.
''Fine. You can buy those red heels anywhere, but... they're sentimental to me. My mother's,'' the woman sends a sad glance my way but I ignore it. ''So, I'll make you a deal. Give me the heels and I'll give you a wish of your heart. Win, win.''
The heels were beautiful, but the woman was right. I didn't need them. So what did I want? My parents were dead. They died in a tornado several years ago. I could bring them back, but I didn't want to. They were probably happy where they were.
I had a nice apartment, I had done what I always wanted to do: move from Kansas to Maine. I had food and water, everything I needed.
That went from the question of what do I need? to What do I want?
It came sudden and clearly; friends.
''Fine. I'll trade you the heels for three new friends,'' I say, already removing the heels. ''Deal, deal, deal!'' the woman cackled. She snapped her fingers and the heels were in her hands and I could barely see three figures walking towards us.
''It was... wonderful... meeting you, Dot.'' the woman says, and her tone implies ''unpleasant'' should take the place of ''wonderful''.
She leaves with a  snap of her fingers, a trail of green smoke left behind. I turn to face my friends.
Slowly, they come into view... a man-sized lion that looks like it used to be a toy puppet for children, something that looks like an oddly bent watering can, and a garden scarecrow.
I sigh. I should have known there would be conditions with the woman's agreements. However, I start walking towards my friends.

Meet Peri and a New Design

First off, thank you all for all those sweet comments on my last post. You guys made me feel so good. <3

Second off, who's Peri? Peri is the new co-author of this blog. I think you'll enjoy Peri's writing, here's a little bio she put together for y'all {Peri doesn't have her own blog}:

Hi, I'm Peri. I love eating healthily, and singing along to music. Adele's my favorite. I love bright colors and I love eating. Haha. Also, I love to pretend I'm a bird.

Why? Because Peri's a bird. Syke. Also, I won't be pretending to be a bird on my blog. -_-

Last Thursday, I bought a bird. Periwinkle. She's a parakeet, and I'm not sure if she's a male or female {you can't tell until they're older, but from now it looks like Peri is a girl.}
And about Peri rocking out to Adele--it's true. She loves it when I sing, but obviously I can't do that forever. So I put some music on shuffle. Peri chirped to some of it, but when it got to Adele, she actually tried to talk {you can tell because the sound she made was not a chirp}. She's lov-er-ly.
Honestly guys, I swear: I love my little bird. You know how long they last? 10-20 years. I could be taking this birdie to college with me, maybe even getting married with it.... -.-

How do you like the new design? Do you have a parakeet? If so, do you have any good tips? :)

My Blog was NOT Deleted. ;)

I realized that if I clicked on one of my blog posts in my site feed, Blogger would say my blog was deleted and not let me view it. :(
I changed my blog address back to what it use to be, so now hopefully when you click on it you can see it.
I'm not actually sure what I'm going to do about this... But I'll keep you updated.

*This blog is still under construction!!*

UPDATE:
Random thought guys: What if dogs/animals understand what we're saying but don't know how to respond?!?! {I know this may not be very scientific, but I just thought it was interesting}

Changing my Blog Address// Blog Title

So imagine this:

A super mature blog, lovely post. You click the comment button. With swift fingers you write words of praise, adding your name at the end. Hoping this blogger would follow you, you add in your own blog address....
And cringe.

Katie's doll world? First off, my name's not Katie. Second off, though this use to be a blog about dolls, it's not anymore. For my own sake I'm changing the blog address. :)
I'm not sure what this actually does, so if you don't see my posts in your special little box, then come make sure blogger did make everybody unfollow me or something. ;)

Also, I'm changing my blog title yet again. Beware new followers, I tend to do this a lot. ;) But I've thought over this one and I hope to stick with it. And with that.... this blog is under construction!! ;) I'm not sure when I'll post again but I'll try to get the whole thing down with before I post. ;)

Do you Ever Feel Like Stopping?

{inspired by this post}

So, I've realized... sometimes I feel like quitting blogging. Often, actually. And no, this is not my ''goodbye'' post. This is just a heart-to-heart chat; you and me.
I always felt a little bit of it, but when I read that post I just realized it.
I look around at all the big bloggers. They have so many followers, so many beautiful $500 camera pictures, so many posts, and the best designs. I can't get to that. But I can try, maybe by not using grammar in my post and pinterest pictures that don't have anything to do with the post.
But, that's not me. Yet I feel so pressured to be that way if I want to have lots of followers.

I just want to be me; have my own style of blogging. Maybe once and a while a post is dull. Maybe most of my posts are picture-less. But is that me? Yes, it is.

I'm still puzzled. Why do we all want to be the best blogger? We all started innocent, just wanting a place to record our thoughts, maybe have that special blogger friend. But it so quickly turns into a game to beat everybody else by having the most sponsors or followers.

I just don't know. What do you think?

xoxo

This Week {#3}

This Week:

• Finding several comments that blogger marked as spam without me knowing and going: ''aw, I missed those comments? Now I can't reply because they'll {dah commenters} won't look for the answers!''} {In short, sorry Jenny and Layla}
• Sleepovers with friends. <3
• The Elite, Maze Runner, Beautiful Chaos, Fever 1783, and more. Uhhhh, 'nuff said.
• Fresh bread baked everyday for the purpose, only, of lunch. Let me stay at your house.
• Starting things. School, dance, CO-OP, even more. I'm not sure if I like it or not.

There should be more, but I went sight seeing earlier today in D.C., and I'm awfully tired. Later my fluffy unicorns. Stay lavender. 

If You Were My Best Friend....

A while ago, several lovely bloggers did this. I don't really know who started it, so I can't give links, but just remember it's not my idea. ;)

If you were my best friend, you'd know...

 

 

...that I am tall. Awkwardly tall for my age, haha. People have been know to think that I'm three years older than I am.

 

....that I hate most pink nail polishes for no reason at all. I have a few corals and light pinks scattered through out my collection, but I stick mainly with blue.

 

...that I can sew, knit, and embroider.

 

....that if you're looking away from me I will draw you, stranger or not. XD

 

 

 

 

 

... I'm fairly socially awkward. Like, I won't talk to you if I don't have a reason to {or something interesting to say...}. Which is probably my downfall, but whatever. -.-

 

... I make weird faces and talk funny a lot. I will come up to you and say something completely random and then walk away as if completely normal. Wahahahaha!

.... I absolutely hate fish. The eating kind and the pets. Bad, bad memories.... O_O

 

That's it for now loves. Bai.

 

{post script: all pictures from pinterest.}